Why did the cabbage beat the carrot in a race?

Lucy Mushi (Guest) on March 21, 2016

I don’t have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long. 🤷‍♂️😂

Nyota (Guest) on March 13, 2016

I love naps. Like, I literally love them. They make me feel better about wasting the day. 😴🛏️

Mwachumu (Guest) on February 28, 2016

Running is great. Unless you faint. 🏃‍♀️🥵

Edwin Ndambuki (Guest) on February 19, 2016

🤣 Didn’t see that coming!

Nicholas Wanjohi (Guest) on February 12, 2016

Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair. 🪑✋

Sarah Mbise (Guest) on February 10, 2016

Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. 💇‍♀️😆

Jafari (Guest) on January 25, 2016

Coffee: because adulting is hard. 😩☕

Abubakari (Guest) on January 18, 2016

What kind of dog can tell time? A watch dog! 🐕⏰

Neema (Guest) on January 17, 2016

Some days, I amaze myself. Other days, I look for my phone while I’m talking on it. 📱🤦‍♀️

Jane Malecela (Guest) on January 16, 2016

I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. 'Alright, get in the basket'. 🚲👮‍♂️

Peter Tibaijuka (Guest) on January 15, 2016

How do you throw a space party? You planet! 🪐🎉

Neema (Guest) on January 11, 2016

Calories don’t count if you eat with friends. 🍰👯‍♂️

Anna Mahiga (Guest) on January 7, 2016

You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks what you do for fun. 🎮🤔

Kenneth Murithi (Guest) on December 29, 2015

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done. 📚✍️

Edward Lowassa (Guest) on December 22, 2015

What’s the hardest part about skydiving? The ground! 🪂🌍

Joyce Nkya (Guest) on December 19, 2015

Exercise? I thought you said extra fries! 🍟🏋️‍♀️

Victor Malima (Guest) on December 15, 2015

I would lose weight, but I hate losing. 😂🏆

Shabani (Guest) on December 10, 2015

🤣 This one’s fire!

Zuhura (Guest) on November 30, 2015

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug. 💑🤣

Kazija (Guest) on November 28, 2015

I'm not short. I'm just concentrated awesome! 👌😂

Dorothy Nkya (Guest) on November 9, 2015

What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-ntain! 🐱⛰️

Mwanaidha (Guest) on November 2, 2015

I don’t care what the question is. The answer is pizza. 🍕🤤

Raha (Guest) on October 24, 2015

What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra! 🐋🎻

Elizabeth Mrema (Guest) on October 15, 2015

What’s a snowman’s favorite snack? Ice Krispies! ⛄🍚

Asha (Guest) on October 9, 2015

What kind of music do mummies like? Wrap music! 🎶🧻

Nyota (Guest) on October 4, 2015

Why did the watch break up with the clock? It found someone better for the time being! ⏰💔

Kahina (Guest) on October 4, 2015

Why did the music teacher go to jail? She got caught with too many notes! 🎼👮‍♀️

Tambwe (Guest) on October 4, 2015

Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks! 🐔🥁

Sharifa (Guest) on September 23, 2015

Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life. 💍😆

Mwinyi (Guest) on September 18, 2015

Haha! I couldn't stop laughing at this one! 🤣

Tabu (Guest) on September 8, 2015

Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🍌🤒

Abdillah (Guest) on September 7, 2015

I don't sweat—I sparkle! ✨😅

Bernard Oduor (Guest) on September 2, 2015

How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card! 🐃💳

Rashid (Guest) on August 29, 2015

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired. 😴💤

Henry Sokoine (Guest) on August 24, 2015

I’m not shy. I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you. 🦸‍♂️😎

Asha (Guest) on August 23, 2015

My hobbies include eating and complaining that I’m gaining weight. 🍕📏

Patrick Mutua (Guest) on August 20, 2015

😂 I need to save this one forever!

Habiba (Guest) on August 11, 2015

Thanks Ackyshine

Grace Njuguna (Guest) on August 8, 2015

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, they just waved! 🌊👋

John Lissu (Guest) on August 4, 2015

I could give up chocolate, but I’m not a quitter. 🍫💪

Joseph Mallya (Guest) on August 2, 2015

My house was clean last week. Sorry you missed it. 🏡🙃

Kassim (Guest) on July 26, 2015

Why did the farmer win the lottery? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾💵

Sultan (Guest) on July 18, 2015

I'm not great at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? 😏🤔

Victor Mwalimu (Guest) on July 13, 2015

If you can’t handle me at my worst, just wait. It gets worse. 😂🤯

Hekima (Guest) on July 1, 2015

I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life. ⏱️😆

Kiza (Guest) on June 23, 2015

Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged! ☕🚔

Alice Mwikali (Guest) on June 22, 2015

What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain? A drizzly bear! 🐻🌧️

Issa (Guest) on June 18, 2015

What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador! 🐕✨

David Sokoine (Guest) on June 18, 2015

Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted! 🐆👀

Frank Sokoine (Guest) on June 17, 2015

😃 Instant mood boost!

Alice Mwikali (Guest) on June 11, 2015

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese! 🧀🤣

Thomas Mtaki (Guest) on May 31, 2015

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying! ✈️📱

Josephine Nduta (Guest) on May 31, 2015

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? You think it’s R, but it be the C! 🏴‍☠️🌊

Patrick Akech (Guest) on May 21, 2015

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early. ⏰💼

Mazrui (Guest) on May 6, 2015

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. 👀🧹

Irene Akoth (Guest) on April 25, 2015

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. 🌞🌙

Violet Mumo (Guest) on April 24, 2015

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure. 🤷‍♂️😅

Jamal (Guest) on April 13, 2015

Life is too short to remove USB safely. 🔌💻

Samuel Were (Guest) on April 7, 2015

What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room! 💀🛋️

Mwajuma (Guest) on April 5, 2015

You know you’re getting old when your candles cost more than your cake. 🎂🔥